- Arrest it before it gets ugly – step in, get in between, don’t hold back – un-confronted conflict festers and only gets worse, IT NEVER RESOLVES ITSELF.
- There are two sides to every conflict – it takes two to tango – hear out both sides.
- Be decisive but keep in mind that you are not inerrant – you can make wrong conclusions – so proceed humbly, ready to adjust your perceptions when new information becomes available.
- Stay cool and neutral – don’t visibly side with one person or another until you’ve had a chance to consider both sides. There is no easier way to discredit yourself than to be perceived as partial by those under your oversight.
- Trust your instincts – Don’t dismiss your gut feelings. If you get the sense that someone isn’t being honest or that something isn’t adding up, you may be picking up on a mismatch between verbal and nonverbal cues. That probably has to do with the fact that our brain takes in over a 1,000 different bits of information per second, but we’re cognitively aware of only 80 of them, so TRUST YOUR INSTINCTS.
- Say little / do a lot – be a (wo)man of your word – if you say you are going to do something, do it. Otherwise don’t say it at all. It’s better not to say stuff at all, then to say it and not do it. If your employees know that you are all talk, they won’t trust you, and, as a leader, you’re only as good as the people under you. If your people trust you, they’ll do anything for you. There will be a team spirit. Tasks will get completed and deadlines will be met – well, safely, and on time. And guess who is going to look good to the upper management because of it? You.
- Be willing to give your people the benefit of the doubt – Oh, you know ‘ol so and so, he’s always doing this and that…, CUT THAT OUT!
- Confront, don’t evade – be respectful, polite, but direct. People appreciate that much more than you realize. Some of my best friends in life ended up being those people whom I confronted when the situation called for it.
- Be consistent – follow the rules without regard for who is involved, be it management, senior employees, seasoned employees, etc.
- Learn from every conflict – when you see the same guy having conflict with several different people in your outfit, there’s the reason for it. He’s not going to be always the victim. Maybe he’s the quiet instigator.
- Practice what you preach – let your actions reflect your words.
- Do what you know is right & don’t worry about pleasing everyone – you will never be able to get everyone to like you at all times. So don’t lose any sleep over that. As long as you try your hardest to do what is right, that’s all that is asked of you.
Oh, and 1 more thing – both the research and personal experience shows that if you consistently apply the above principles at your workplace, you will earn the respect of your people.
